After seven years of love, laughter and friendship, Tracy and Tiffany married in September of 2015. The happy brides, who reside in Greensboro, N.C., share the story of their love and special wedding day below:
Black Lesbian Love Lab (BL3): How did you meet?
Tracy and Tiffany: We met at church in another city, and found out that we both lived in the same town. We began hanging out as friends and the rest is history!
BL3: What attracted you to each other?
Tracy: I was drawn to Tiffany’s cheerful personality, and her devotion to church, family and friends. Tiffany: Tracy and I just started out as friends, but as we got to know each other, I saw how hard she worked for what she wanted. She is so goal-oriented!
BL3: Tell us about your first date.
Tiffany: Because we were friends first, we can’t remember our first date. I kind of like that about our relationship because it didn’t make things uncomfortable. I didn’t have to worry about the jitters of the first date or ordering a salad for dinner (even though I love salads).
BL3: What do you love about each other?
Tiffany: I love Tracy’s passion that she has for different things in life.
Tracy: I love Tiffany’s cheerfulness and how selfless she is.
BL3: Why did you decide to get married, especially after seven years?
Tracey: We both wanted to spend the rest of our lives with someone who loves us for who we are and allows us to love them.
Tiffany: Tracy is also one of my biggest supporters. Who wouldn’t want that for the rest of your life?
BL3: Tell me a bit about your wedding day. What made it special?
Tiffany: I thought I would be nervous on the day of the wedding, but I guess since I was so nervous the weeks leading to it, I didn’t have any nervousness left. This day was special to me because everyone there was in support and not judgment. This not only made me happy but Tracy also. If she is happy, I’m happy!
Tracy: Our day was special because we had come through almost a year of planning and we were in agreement on everything (from the flowers to the decorations to the candy buffet). We worked hard to ensure each of us was happy. With two brides, we wanted each of us to feel special and feel like the day was all about each of us!
Another special thing is that for most of our guests, this was [their] first time attending a same-sex wedding. We’re in the south, in the Bible belt. Although we experienced some heartache and loss of relationships along the way, in the end true friends and family were right there supporting us.
We’ve been told that our union has brought the issue of same-gender-loving relationships to the forefront and caused many to have to consciously reconsider their long-held beliefs and determine what really matters most. Love is love!!
BL3: What wedding traditions did you keep and which ones did you get rid of and why?
Tiffany: The night before the wedding, I presented Tracy with something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. I know she was surprised and I LOVED IT!
Tracy: We ditched the traditions like seating guests by choosing sides. We wanted everybody intermingled! We also did not include throwing bouquets or removing garters. It was important to us to keep Christian traditions like having premarital counseling with a Christian pastor, having prayer and the Lord’s Prayer sang during the ceremony.
BL3: Where was the wedding and reception held? At a church or somewhere else? And why?
Tracey and Tiffany: Neither of us belonged to a welcoming and affirming church at the time. We took extra care to ensure everybody involved (guests and vendors), were in agreement with and supportive of same-sex marriage. So we definitely wanted the venue to have the best atmosphere. The wedding and reception were held at Tracy’s brother’s catering facility–ceremony outside on the patio, reception in the inside dining area. We knew it was a great facility, but when we saw it decorated for our wedding, we knew it was the best place!
BL3: How did it feel to exchange vows? Did you write your own vows?
Tiffany: I wrote my own vows and it felt good to say what was in my heart. I felt like in that moment I could wrap up the feelings and love that I have for Tracy in words. Of course all of it could not be said in a couple of words, but I promise to show it every moment I have for the rest of my life.
Tracy: I knew I would cry! I could hardly finish reading everything without my voice cracking. It felt like everything I feel for Tiffany (all of my love, concern and “lust”) was magnified 100 times in that moment.
BL3: What was the most memorable part of the day?
Tiffany: The most memorable part of the day is when I came out the doors and saw Tracy standing waiting for me. The closer I got to her the more I felt the love and connection between us.
Tracy: Most memorable for me are two things–the way my baby brother escorted me in and walked away to go and get Tiffany to escort her in to me, and the way Tiffany looked when those doors were opened. She was a beautiful princess! I will never forget it.